At our TaLK national orientation, I was
told that I might have students with special needs or some kinds of mental
disabilities. Once I started teaching, I realized that I do indeed have one
student with special needs. I am not even sure how to phrase the label to
describe Student A to be politically correct or sensitive. For the sake of just
me sharing my experience, I would just describe Student A as having a mental
disability. I never asked the homeroom teacher or anyone what’s wrong with the
student. Just by observing how he talked and acted in class, I could tell that
he wasn’t the same as other students. Student A is a tall and growing boy for a
kid in second grade but from the outside, he doesn’t look much different.
Student A is currently
in second grade. I first met him when he was in first grade. When we first met,
I didn’t pay much attention to him. He was just one of the students in my
class. Like most of the other students in first grade, he often yelled random
Korean out loud so I just treated him like all the other students. My co-teacher
told me that the homeroom teacher often seat him next to one of the good
students in class so he can help him. This worked out well for me because my
best student was helping the student that needed help. Class went on just as
usual and Student A was just a student to me.
There was an incident
that made me feel extremely bad towards Student A. During one of my lessons, I
didn’t make enough copies for the whole class so Student A didn’t get a paper.
In a way, I went on with my lesson because I thought he didn’t really know what
I was doing anyway. He usually didn’t write anything on the past worksheets. He
often walks around class and looks at things on his own. We all just let him do
whatever as long as he is not making too much noise. I figured he wouldn’t care
if he didn’t get a worksheet. The homeroom teacher noticed and asked me for a
worksheet for him. I hurriedly got him a copy of the worksheet. I was extremely
embarrassed and felt like the worst person in the world. That day, no matter
what I did, I couldn’t feel better about myself. I was a bad teacher who
neglected a student because I didn’t think he knew what was going on. I made
assumptions and I didn’t treat him fairly. Even though it wasn’t a big deal and
the homeroom teacher just thought I forgot to give him a worksheet, it was a
lesson I will never forget. Instead of giving him more attention and the help
he needed, I completely just bypassed it. From that day forward, I vowed to
never make the same judgment again.
After my first semester
with TaLK, the students started a new school year. This meant that Student A
was now in second grade. This class continued to have same dynamic: loud and
very physically active. They continued to yell and run around the class. One
thing did change though; my best student was no longer there. He had moved schools.
The problem is now Student A doesn’t have anyone to help him while I teach the
class. During my lessons, he often just yells out random Korean phrases or make
sounds. This happens all the time and he only quiets down when my co-teacher or
I help him and physically stay by his side. In most of the lessons, student A’s
voice and yelling became background noise. The whole class and even I just
continued on with our activities.
One time, student A
started crying really loudly and another boy student go to grab a stick to
scare him, pretending to hit him. This made Student A run and cry even louder.
The homeroom teacher stepped in and calmed him down. I felt frozen because
there was nothing I could do or say. I didn’t know what happened and I didn’t
know why he was crying. The class finally calmed down after the homeroom
teacher gave the class a lecture. I then just continued the class by playing a
song on youtube. I thought it might lighten up the mood.
Just recently, I
received a surprised from Student A. For one lesson, I had my co- teacher do an
alphabet-writing practice with the students. I decided that I should just sit
next to Student A and show him how to write individually. So while my co
teacher write the alphabet on the board, I wrote it on Student A’s paper then
he would copy what I did. We did this from A to Z. The next activity was an
alphabet test. My co-teacher would say one letter and the students would have
to write that letter on the sheet given. My assumption was that Student A would
not know what to do but he surprised me by writing out each letter being called.
Each time, my co-teacher said a letter, it took him a little time to think but
he wrote it. Sitting there next to him, I was so impressed and I was so happy
that he knew so much. We graded the test after and he got a 100%. He did better
than most of the students in the class! Student A made my day that day and I
kept his test after class in my folder to bring home. I wanted to keep it to
remind me how rewarding it felt to know that he learned something from me.
During
that same lesson, Student A also got really upset at the other boys in the
class. I didn’t know this until my co-teacher told me after class that the
other boys were calling him “oppa”. I know that “oppa” is a term girls used to
call their older brothers. My co-teacher told me that Student A usually doesn’t
get upset but today he told her to tell them to stop. As time passed and as he
grew older, I think Student A is a bit more self-aware and more mindful of the
surroundings around him. I think he knows that he is somewhat different and
maybe some things are starting to bother him.
I really hope and wish
that I could spend more time just teaching Student A but I can’t just sit with
him individually all the time. Student A will never know this but he taught me
more than I could ever teach him. With just these minor incidents, he showed me
that people are more than what they seem and that I can’t make judgments.
Student A is smart and he knows more than most students in my class but most of
us just overlook his intelligence with our assumptions of people with mental
disabilities. I believe that he is very capable and I wish that I could somehow
make him feel that way or help him understand that he should be allowed to
dream also. No one should limit him from that.
"I give you a new commandment: love one another. As I have loved you, so you also should love one another" -John 13: 34
